As is our custom, today we offer some parting words to local high school (and college) graduates as they get ready to walk the aisle and receive their diploma.
In a sense, no matter what the conditions of the world we live in, our basic advice is going to be similar each year: Remember what you’ve learned, use the gifts God’s given you and take the initiative to do something positive that will be a benefit not only to yourself, but to others. It’s the same thing you’d hear at graduations the world over.
But our world is changing and things are definitely tougher than they were when our current graduates entered high school or college. People who were working then are unemployed. Money is tight. The recession hangs on, at least in the minds of many of us who look at the bottom lines in our household budgets.
So what should a high school graduate leaving the warm confines of Sweet Home High School or East Linn Christian Academy or the dining room table, if they’re home-schooled, be thinking right about now? What should the college graduate be aiming for?
Likely, you’re pretty up on the points mentioned above. You’ve been encouraged by teachers and, likely, family members to move on to bigger and better things geographically and/or otherwise. You’ve been schooled in subjects and skills that are supposed to have prepared you for life.
Whether your goal is to go out and make something of yourself in the big world outside of Sweet Home or whether you will be starting closer to home, the principles you should take to heart don’t really change.
There are a thousand things we could say, but here are a few scattered thoughts to ponder.
n Work hard but not too hard. Some wealth is necessary for survival in our world and work is good for us, even if it doesn’t seem like it early on Monday morning. Look around you at people who don’t work and you’ll soon realize that idleness is not healthy. However, there needs to be a balance between the grind and spending time with your family, especially if you’re married. Relationships and workaholics don’t mix well.
Money doesn’t lead to happiness. That runs against the grain a little, but it’s true. People who are rich are, surprisingly, often miserable but they still think more money will make them happier. That’s because there’s a lot more to living life to its fullness than money.
According to Forbes magazine (which rich people read), surveys have found virtually the same level of happiness between the very rich individuals on the Forbes 400 and the Maasai herdsmen of East Africa.
To loosely mimic a popular TV advertising spokesman, think about that thing you really want. Now think about that thing you really wanted and got. How long did the thrill last? What makes you think the thrill will last any longer next time?
n Build your relationships. Think long-term. When you’re old and gray, sitting in your rocking chair, do you want to be surrounded by (a) stacks of money; (b) piles of reports; (c) shelves full of video games that you’ve conquered; (d) dusty athletic trophies; (e) brochures from all the exotic places you’ve traveled to; (f) a computer or albums full of photos; (g) a garage full of shiny cars or whatever else you think your heart desires; (h) loving friends and family members who care about you and want to be with you.
If the latter is what you want, that means developing those relationships now – treating others honestly and with respect, spending time with and setting a good example for your kids (when you have some), investing in your spouse and your friends and just basically treating others the way you’d like to be treated. What goes around comes around.
Remember, most of all, that successful marriage is hard work. Keeping the relationship healthy isn’t just about you. It’s about them too. Happiness comes and goes, and sometimes you have to be patient and do the little things to maintain it or bring it back. Sometimes the little things end up being big things.
n Face-to-face is better than Facebook. Don’t get caught up in the rush that comes with not having to deal with the non-verbal element of communication. It’s easy to fire off comments on a blog or on your social media page that you might not say if the person were looking you right in the eye.,
Don’t say things you wouldn’t want your grandmother to read – or your next boss. Above all, don’t lose your temper on-line. Build your relationships on a personal level, even if it’s over the phone, rather than in the fake warmth of social media. Think about it. You’ll figure out what we’re talking about.
n Maintain your honor. Honor is a core value in America and other cultures that has lost importance for many in today’s fast-paced, high-tech, all-about-me world. Honor is the quality of having a good name, of being respected. It is doing the right thing even when nobody else is around to see what you’re doing. It is standing up for what is right, even if you are standing alone. The values you have learned, hopefully at home but at least in our local schools – respect for others, safe and responsible behavior – all will contribute to your honor if you practice them.
A core ingredient of honor is honesty and it underlies many of the points discussed already. If you are honorable, you will do the right thing by someone else, no matter what it costs you.
Joe Paterno, football coach at Penn State since 1966, is one of the most respected men in his field – and for good reason. He’s embodied a lot of the traits we’ve talked about here.
Paterno once said: “Success without honor is an unseasoned dish; it will satisfy your hunger, but it won’t taste good.” We’re quoting him for a reason: We couldn’t say it any better.
The bad news is that if you lose your honor, you can’t get it back. It’s gone forever, or it will at least forever be tainted.
We hope all of our graduates move on to great things. We hope you find success. We hope you are an honorable person, respected and loved by all who know you.
Be innovative, be ambitious, be honorable, respect yourself and others, and above all, keep permanent body art to a minimum.
God bless you.