Sweet Home Junior High School is steering away from anti-bullying messages and focusing on the positive: Be kind.
School staff and students have been promoting the unusual way to fight bullying for the past few weeks, including a visit from speaker Drew Stevens of Las Vegas on Wednesday, Feb. 20.
Stevens said he has spoken to more than 200,000 students around the country with the “Be Kind” message inspired by his late son, Josh Stevens. Stevens started the nonprofit Josh Stevens Foundation to inspire students the way his son inspired him.
Josh, nearly 13, died while riding with his father in a golf cart through their south Las Vegas neighborhood in September 2008.
At a “T” intersection, some residents waved at the two, Stevens said. “We turned and waved. Josh told me to honk the horn. I clearly had my eyes off the road.”
When Stevens turned his attention back to the road, a boat was taking up half of the roadway. He instinctively jerked the steering wheel narrowly missing the boat. Josh was ejected from the cart.
Police believe that Josh’s neck hit the swim board, and his carotid artery was severed, Stevens said. They had been traveling at about 14 mph, and Stevens noted that had he not reacted, they might have been hurt but both would likely have survived.
He thought Josh might have had a skinned knee, minor injuries. He reached him, and within a matter of seconds, Josh died in his father’s arms.
Reflecting on his son, a talented athlete and football player, who was starting quarterback on an undefeated team, the one thing that stood out wasn’t his son’s athletic achievements but rather his kindness.
More than four years later, no one remembers Josh for his athletics, Stevens said. They remember other things.
He was incredibly kind, Stevens said. He would seek out lonely peers and befriend them.
“This is why I’m here today,” Stevens said. “I would give anything to have 30 seconds with my son.”
He said if he had the opportunity, he would remind his son how much his mother, father and family love and miss him, and then he would tell him, “it’s because of the way you lived your life here on earth for 12 short years you have left a legacy.
“It’s because of the way he chose to treat other people.
KINDNESS ADVOCATE Josh Stevens
speaks with students during an assembly last
week at Sweet Home Junior High School.
The legacy you leave is everything. It’s never too late to talk about how you want to be remembered.
“It’s because of the way he chose to treat other people. The legacy you leave is everything. It’s never too late to talk about how you want to be remembered.
“The choices you make determine the life you live and the legacy you leave behind.”
Stevens urged the students to leave a legacy they and their families could be proud of.
His son inspired him to start a nonprofit foundation to promote random acts of kindness, he said. To that end, he speaks to students regularly. Stevens said he isn’t paid but is able to travel because he owns a business and his partner and employees support his effort.
He said he believes his son is making an even greater difference than he did before his death.
“I believe Josh’s purpose in life was just this, to inspire others,” Stevens said, although he would take it all back if he could.
He said he hoped students would go home and discuss these ideas with their families. In school, he urged students to stand up for other students when they see something happening to remind their classmates, “this is a be-kind school. We don’t tolerate that behavior here.”
Vice Principal Josh Dargis said if students show kindness, he hopes bullying will stop.
“It’s a new way to look at bullying, this be-kind program,” he said.
As part of the be-kind effort, staff and students are recognizing students for being kind. Students may be nominated for committing acts of kindness. Staff members select students for recognition. Not all nominees are selected. The staff members receive additional input from other staff members and students before awarding recognition in the form of a bracelet or be-kind t-shirt.
They recognize the students in their classrooms as a way “to tell them they’re being awesome,” Dargis said. They also give away tickets that students can use to bid on a variety of prizes each month, including t-shirts, coupons for the Rio Theater, Figaro’s, McDonald’s and more.
“We were looking for something to kind of help change the culture of the school,” said teacher Shelly Rowe. Shanna Turner, a probation officer with the Juvenile Department, directed the school to Stevens and his be-kind program.
But it’s too new to measure the impact of the program, Dargis said. “It is starting in the right direction.”
“Kids are showing an interest,” Rowe said.
A student Junior Advisory Group is helping, coming up with ideas and solutions from a student perspective.
Students see things differently from the adults in the school, Dargis said.
The program comes to Sweet Home Junior High following several years of the Positive Behavior Incentive System.
That system has helped make expectations of students uniform throughout the school, said Principal Hal Huschka. Everybody knows what is expected of him or her.
He doesn’t think that bullying is any worse than it was 18 years ago when he came to the school, but “Be Kind” comes at the ongoing problem from a positive direction.
“Hopefully this is something that makes it OK for kids to be kind,” Huschka said.
Students said they see a difference.
“I think that ‘be kind’ is having a ripple effect,” said eighth grader Corbitt Sanders.
Students she wouldn’t have expected are going after the bracelets, said Tori Clark.
Before the “Be Kind” emphasis started, some students would act a certain way just for the attention, said Sophia Brown.
When people pursue the rewards, it means they’re trying, Corbitt said. “Over time it gets more and more natural.”
“Once they get this, they’ll start doing kind things when no one’s looking – integrity,” Tori said.
Janel Aiello related a story from a peer tutor, who told her he saw eighth-graders tear up an autistic student’s permission slip for swimming. The tutor stood up for the autistic student with a “be-kind” message, and the eighth-graders backed off.
“During elementary school, I was bullied,” Sophia said. Now, she isn’t, and she doesn’t see people bullying each other.
There was a lot more bullying at the beginning of the school year, Corbitt said.
“I think it’s starting to simmer down.”
Tori said she has been bullied for being a bookworm. Once “Be Kind” started, it has stopped with everyone except one student. Other students are standing up for the bullied.
It’s an idea Corbitt believes should be in every school, and Sophia encouraged people to practice it in the community.